How many times have you heard (or said) those four words? If your answer is less than ten, you can skip the rest of this. But, if you're like me, read on, moms (and daughters*, so you can understand the crazy.)
Over the years I've written about relationships: being a grandma, daughter, sister, mom, stepparent, wife, even a friend. In some of these epistles I've merely described our relationship and how it made me feel, while in other entries I have proffered my insight, gained from experience, on the right way the other person should behave. Many times I do poke fun at myself, but I also point out how my parent/sister/husband/daughter could have acted more appropriately.
I am here to turn the table on myself, to put my misdeeds in the spotlight. Why? For three very good (and beautiful) reasons--you know who you are. But also I want to share this with you moms out there who may not have completely severed that umbilical cord yet, even though it's been over 25 years since you gave birth.
*Disclaimer: I have no idea if this applies to sons. I don't have any of those.
How to alienate your adult daughter in 10 easy steps
- Give unsolicited advice; try to fix everything
- Call/text/email her several times a day
- Point out her weaknesses (as if she doesn't know already)
- Constantly give examples of how you did things "back in the day"
- Listen to conversations with her spouse; interject your own thoughts
- Compare her to her sibling(s) or worse, discuss her with her sibling
- Persist in interfering even after she pleads with you to let it go
- Disapprove of her parenting style
- Treat her like a child
- Neglect telling her how proud you are of her accomplishments
