On Destiny

Why does one person accept a proffered helping hand while yet another person rejects it completely? How does one person escape from an inevitable future of poverty, abuse and addiction, yet another breaks free of the cycle? Is it chance? Fate? Something I did? Something I did not do? Two young people, from the same community, same backgrounds, similar histories of abuse, neglect, and abject hopelessness, recently came into our lives, put in our path by God's divine plan. One is a young man we've known for a few months, who's sporadically helped us as a handyman and laborer, who Alex took under his wing to mentor and guide and perhaps to break the cycle of bad choices; the other is a young unmarried mom introduced to us by friends up the road when she became homeless and had no place else to turn. Both of them experienced a childhood no child should ever even know about, let alone live. Both had at least one person who cared about them, who reached out to them, but, for one reason or another, who also deserted them and gave up. Both of them were failed by an inadequate system, lost in a social services network overburdened by hundreds of lost children just like them. Both of them bounced from house to house, even ending up living in the woods or by the river because they either had no place else to go, or because the alternative was to live in homes so toxic it would destroy them. 

The young man has tried to change, but keeps getting sucked back into the only world he has ever known, believing the lies that he is hopeless, that he will never change, and that he can fix himself. He says his kids are his everything, but puts himself first. And now, after weeks of us trying to help him--going to parole meetings, posting bond, and countless talks and meals and prayer--he has vanished back into the woods, back to his comfort zone, possibly back to drugs. The young woman got a job thanks to her cousin, and has kept that job for over a month; she is currently looking for her own place. I am amazed at what a caring, loving and consistent mom she is, especially since she had no positive role model growing up. 

I can't help but compare this scenario to my own life, and, more broadly, to mankind. We are all so desperately lost, following the ways of the world and listening to the whispers of Satan since Adam and Eve capitulated to the serpent in the Garden. We make the same mistakes over and over again, and think we can fix it, that we know better, that we have all the answers. And God is always there, reaching out for us, offering His help and wisdom through His word, and many of us stubbornly refuse His help, and reject the precious gift of His Son. 

Is one person stronger or more resilient than the other? I just don't know. What I do know is that without grace I would still be lost, heading towards ruin and an eternity of suffering. Like the song, I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see. By grace. God's amazing grace.