James, brother of Jesus, may have only written one short book in the Bible, but oh what words of wisdom and truth he shares under the guidance of the Holy Spirt. Words about words, our words, and how humans are incapable of controlling their words. Yes, humans, the most intelligent beings in the world, can do so many things. Man can control the flow of water by building dams, control animals with leashes and reins, control the temperature in our homes through technology, yet cannot control his own tongue. James warns his fellow followers of his brother, Jesus Christ, about the danger that resides in our own bodies, and advises us, "Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness." (James 3:1)
Gulp. I think he means me...not only do I spend a lot of time tutoring elementary school children, every moment in my life is a teaching moment, and lately, I am embarrassed to say, those moments have not always been controlled or even kind. Though I grew up surrounded by sarcasm and passive aggressiveness, I have waged a lifelong battle trying to rid myself of any shred of evidence of it, or at least subdue it into submission; sadly, it still rears its ugly head when I am tired, overwhelmed, or under stress. That damn sin of pride, of thinking I am oh so clever, shows itself and shows off. And I hate it. And for a brief moment, I excuse it, because, as James wrote, "For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body." (James 3:2)
I can put a leash on my dogs, a choke collar, or an e-collar, and make them obey me, yet I cannot control my tongue. I've mastered the skill of driving a 2,000 pound vehicle on four wheels by using my hands to steer through heavy traffic and my feet to control speed and stopping, yet I am incapable of controlling my tongue. Such a tiny part of my body can say words of love or spew hurt; and words, once said, cannot be sucked back in as if I never uttered them.
And why this sudden interest in my tongue? Why do I beat myself up for my lack of self-control? Have I been counseled by a friend to be more careful above what I say? Chided by my spouse for being sarcastic? Misunderstood by someone for a careless remark? No. I am being schooled by a 10 year old little girl who also happens to be my granddaughter. She, too, is wise and witty and sensitive like her grandmother. We have been spending quite a lot of time together over the past 18 months, so she sees (and hears) me at all hours of the day. When I am tired, in pain, hungry, irritated, preoccupied, startled, asleep, engrossed in phone notifications, playing a game, doing laundry, talking on the phone, interacting with my husband, washing my face, brushing my teeth, going to church...yes, everyday life. Like any parent with a 10 year old and a life.
But I have grown lazy and prideful and comfortable with my dry humor, smart-ass remarks and witticisms. Our children are grown with their own kids now. I assume that because I am a parent and a grandparent, I can get away with it all, you know, with "just being me." They will "get" it, right? The sighs and off hand remarks will go unnoticed, right?
Wrong. That little 10 year old is smart as a whip, reads well above her grade level, does not miss a beat, adores me, and knows how much I adore her. Dangerous combination. And a perfect opportunity for me to be taken to task for being obtuse, and schooled on how to be present when caring for and guiding a fragile, malleable child, especially one who has complete trust in me and believes everything I say.
"For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. (James 3:8)
Well, no human being with the exception, perhaps, of one little girl lovingly reminding her grandma she should try.
Funny how the Lord employs those we think we are teaching to teach us!
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