Have you ever looked back on a rough place in life and realized that something you did or neglected to do precipitated that very situation? That by not stopping and thinking it through, by not praying over a decision, by just reacting emotionally and plowing forward caused an avalanche? Yeah, well I’ve done that quite a few times in my 60 plus years, making knee jerk decisions and reacting emotionally instead of cognitively. It’s not pretty, and it’s quite embarrassing to admit. And when that momentary lapse in judgment snowballs out of control, you can get crushed by the weight of it. With crystal clarity, I see how a response made in anger, to hurt those who hurt me, precipitated a storm of epic proportions. I knew my defiance would piss them off—I just didn’t know how pissed off they could get. Eighteen months and over fifteen thousand dollars later, I found out.
Hindsight is always 20/20, and tears of regret could fill an ocean, and this is no exception. And while it was demoralizing to realize I was worth less than a poodle, I can honestly say it was refreshing to finally learn what they really thought of me. Made letting go that much easier—no pretense or facades to deal with anymore. So, to whom it may concern: I am sorry for not telling you where the dog was. I was angry and sad and felt betrayed so I reacted by refusing, because I knew it would make you all mad. If I’d known that I’d be sued over a dog, I’d have driven you all to his new owner’s house. In a limousine. With champagne. And a marching band.
Maybe things would have turned out differently.
But I doubt it.
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