Choosing to Love

Love...so much has been written about that little word, and there are as many definitions of love as there are people in this world.  But while Webster defines love as "a feeling of intense affection for another person," the Bible shows us true Christian love "can only spring from a motivation which takes into account the love of God in Christ." (John Piper, Desiring God).   

I recently participated in a Bible study with women in our community and my church, focusing on Tim Keller's study of 1 John.  Out of eight weeks and hours of study and discussion, one verse sticks out:  "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God." 1John 4:7.  Our discussion of this verse centered on a believer's love being the love of the will, not of emotion, friendship, or physical love; a love that CHOOSES to love.  Not because the person we love is virtuous, or attractive, or lovable, or even nice.  But because God loves us, and we are now in God, we are motivated to love others.  

This small excerpt of an eight-week study hit me like a ton of bricks.   Immediately I knew God was speaking to me about my mom.  See, my mom is not lovable, virtuous, Christian, or even nice.  I am not even sure she is sane.  She has never been nice, and as far as I know, she is totally incapable of loving anyone or anything.  And despite everything I have suffered and endured because of her, I realized I do love my mom.  I choose to love her.  It is an act of will.  I want what is best for her, for her to be safe, and taken care of.  Regardless of how she acts or reacts, I still love her.  I visit her, despite rebuffs and curses.  I take care of her affairs, despite the ridicule and shunning from my sisters.  

And it astounds and amazes me.  This love that I have for this bitter, crazy old woman, who'd just as soon spit at me as hug me.  How is this possible?  Only through Christ.  

I do not deserve this, this ability to love as Christ loves us.  But I believe it, I feel it, and I see it impacting my life and the lives of those around me.  Only by God's grace am I able to love the difficult people in my life--and my mom ain't nothing if she ain't difficult!  The easy thing to do (the selfish thing) would be to cut difficult people out of my life--I have tried to cut her out of my life for over 45 years, but God keeps throwing her into my path.  And who am I to argue with the Almighty God?  

"And this commandment we have from him:  

whoever loves God must also love his brother."

  1 John 4:21