The person you care for...
- talks about bodily fluids and functions at dinner
- plays with fire and candles and lights napkins on fire by accident
- cannot be trusted to use an electric stove
- gets scared when she messes up
- has temper tantrums when things don't go as planned
- is easily frustrated and irritated, impatient, and self absorbed
- picks up everything and touches things, at stores, at other houses, and at home
- needs to be reminded about personal hygiene
- lets the dog eat off her dish, fork, or out of the container
- tells little fibs or exaggerates to look better
- never admits being wrong, hides things she has broken or ruined
- breaks and spills things constantly
- always wants to have what you're eating or drinking
- only wants to eat sweets and ice cream
- won't listen to those in authority
- is demanding and wants what she wants right away
- has very little comprehension of dangers or safety risks
- displays inappropriate social behavior (talking loudly, burping in public, pointing out physical differences in public, e.g. "she is so fat!" or "look at that hair!")
- licks the food off a salt shaker after it falls on her plate then puts the shaker back on the table
- affords you little to no privacy
- wants to be the center of attention
- wakes you up because she's awake, and only lets you relax when she is sleeping
- expects gifts without giving in return
Well, you might be a parent. But you could also very likely be a caregiver for your aging parent.
Believe me, being a mom wasn't easy. But being a daughter/mom of my mom is so much harder. The scary part of this is that my mom was a pediatric nurse for 30 plus years, raised five children, was a Girl Scout leader, was impeccably dressed and coifed at all times, hushed us when we were too loud, scolded us for improper table etiquette like no elbows on the table (killing the table fairies!), and made sure we ate right and took care of ourselves and wrote thank you notes right away. She never forgot a birthday or anniversary. She wasn't perfect, oh no. But who is this person who lives with me now? I don't recognize her. She, on the other hand, recognizes me, but only as she saw me 50 years ago. She doesn't think I am capable of taking care of her, or qualified to give her advice or to help her, unless it is under her tutelage.
Aging has become a national business, the cash cow of the "healthcare" industry. You've seen the brochure, the internet ads, the not so subtle hyperlinks when you enter a web search for affordable senior housing. It isn't all the smiling faces and adorable elderly people we see in ads. It is hard work. But service usually is. If being a servant was easy or high paying, heck, everyone would do it.
Lord, give me a servant's heart.
No comments:
Post a Comment